Saturday, December 17, 2011

Updates and More.....

Hello blogging world. It's been way too long since I last posted (over one month), so I've got a lot of catching up to do. I never realized how hard it is to keep up with blogging, especially as you go on living your life. I can't promise I'll do any better, but I will from time to time update you all as often as possible.

When I last blogged, we were about to have our second visit with the social workers. This was the visit where they come to our house and talk to us and make sure our home is suitable for raising a child. Believe it or not, I really wasn't nervous about this at all. There is something great about our agency and our social workers where Jason and I feel totally at ease with them. It's like talking to a friend; albeit a friend that has the power to alter the direction of your future....but let's not look at it like that. So, all went well with this visit. We had a great chat, talking about lots of social issues with adoption and how it will be to raise a child that has two dads. They took a tour of our house, and that was easier than I thought it would be too. There was no "white glove" inspection. It was simply a tour to show the amenities of our home and where we were planning to have the child's room. That was kind of neat as we got to tell them where the crib would be and how we would rearrange things to fit the needs of our baby. At the end of this visit we closed out the rest of our paperwork, and then it was time to wait for our Child Protective Services Registry & Fingerprint/Criminal History Background search. And believe me, wait we did....

It just so happened that same day we were headed up to Bethesda, MD, for the Adoption Conference held by Families for Private Adoption (FPA). The conference was actually the next day, but we decided to go the night before and enjoy the evening so we were well rested for the conference. We had a great time in Bethesda. I surprised Jason and took him to the Le Creuset store (1 of only 6 in the entire country that just so happened to be in Bethesda) and bought him some more cookware for his collection. We ate a fabulous dinner and celebrated our progress with a great bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon. Here's a picture of Jason with his new cookware (and apron).


The conference was great. There were probably about 70 other couples and some single people there, and it was comforting knowing we were all going through the same thing. There were lawyers, social workers, adoptive parents, and even a birthmother there all giving their unique perspectives about adoption. Overall, we were glad we went and marked this down as another great experience in the adoption process. Here's a picture of us at the conference. Can you spot where we are?


Now, all of this took place on November 18th. Remember how I said we waited a long time for the Child Protective Services and Fingerprint/Criminal History Background search? Well, those did not come back until December 14th! Normally, they only take about 10 days on average, but for some reason these were being held up and taking longer than normal. At first I started to worry as I thought there was something wrong; but, our social workers let us know that we were not the only ones that were waiting longer than normal. It was taking several of their clients longer than normal, so they attributed it to the Holidays or staff levels this time of year. Jason and I really wanted to get these back as we could not have our 3rd and final meeting until such time. We looked at our schedules for the remaining of the year, and the last day we could possibly meet would be on...you guessed it...December 15th. At 9:30 pm December 14th, I received an email from the social workers telling me the forms just came into their office, and that they could meet with us on the 15th. Talk about cutting it close!

I'm happy to say that we met with them on the 15th and held our last meeting. This meeting was a discussion about potential issues with children, both psychological and physical, to include Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Sensory Deprivation among others. We also discussed how we could best meet the needs of a child; that is, trying to match our capabilities with a child's needs. It's weird to say that, as it sounds like we are "putting an order in" for a child. But it wasn't like that at all. Remember, we are all looking for what is best for the child. So, understanding upfront what our capabilities are will help the agency make the best match. We left that meeting, again, feeling totally at ease and comfortable with the process. The next step is to actually receive the draft Homestudy Report. This will be the social worker's write-up of our situation, and it is provided to us first so that we can review and make comments/corrections if need be. We are expecting this draft report in the beginning of January, so we can enjoy the Holidays now and not worry about when we are going to get it. The final piece of this homestudy are the classes we have to take, which are scheduled for mid January. This is an all day class that delves further into adoption and other topics.

One last thing. We are starting to work on our networking capabilities; that is, we want all of YOU to help us get the word out. Let everyone and anyone you know (and even strangers) that there is a loving couple who are trying to adopt. Our agency says that word of mouth is the best form of advertising, as you never know what could happen. You may know someone....who knows someone....who has a cousin that knows someone....who is looking for a good home for her baby. See how that works? So, please. help us get the word out. Additionally, we are working on a Profile Website which should be up and running by the end of January, so we'll give you the details about that once it is established.

If you are still reading this post (and haven't given up due to the length), I wanted to say Thank You for sticking with it. I know it's a lot of information, but that's what happens when I don't post for a full month. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we draw closer to meeting the little one that is out there. He/She is slowly making their way to us....one baby step at a time.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!


~Anthony

5 comments:

Stephanie Winiarski said...

YAY!! I am so excited that you finally posted! hehe And of course I am excited that everything is going right along. You are both great people and will wonderful dads!!! Love you both!!

debo said...

I love reading the post, you need to write a book..I dont know what it is but every time I read your post I become overwhelmed with feelings of love,joy and excitement to the point of almost tears.this is such a great thing you are doing and I know it is ganna work out .. I think you should try for twinns.I wish every child could be loved as much as your ganna love your kids...love ya both debo

debo said...

I love reading the post, you need to write a book..I dont know what it is but every time I read your post I become overwhelmed with feelings of love,joy and excitement to the point of almost tears.this is such a great thing you are doing and I know it is ganna work out .. I think you should try for twinns.I wish every child could be loved as much as your ganna love your kids...love ya both debo

Fritch said...

I'm rooting for you guys! Let me know the next time you're in MD...

Bree McCollum said...

Lots of stuff to go through but it will be so worth it when you are holding that little tiny human in your arms. I have a picture of Jason holding Darius when he was first born and Anthony you are standing with him and I love that pic and I look at it a lot thinking that that will be y'all soon holding a baby of your very own. Love reading the blog and as always I love you and may God bless you with a wonderful child to complete your family!!!

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